Why does life constantly throw hard balls at you? How many times can one get knocked down and constantly get up again? As for me, personally, I’ve been knocked down so many times it doesn’t phase me anymore. Have I really become some emotionless being that just doesn’t care anymore? Or do things not surprise me?

It’s been a while since I wrote my last blog. The new “Tamara” gets so lazy and sidetracked now I tend to forget and stop caring. I have to laugh about this because in my 20s, I had so much drive, so much ambition, I sit down and think to myself: “where did that all go?” Yes, where DID that drive to succeed go?. Back then, I was doing everything wrong because I was doing what I’ve been told: “go to school and get a “safe job”. Every time I tried school out things never worked out, I mean I got good grade etc but long story short, I always had to end up losing in the end. I won’t go into details now because I don’t to talk about since no one understand. No one cares to understand I am accept that and stay silent for the most part.

Clearly I am not wealthy yet LOL

I am going back to work today, the investments I made in July one will come on December 17th but the music still will take some time. I pulled my back out in September and was out of work for 2 weeks. The only reason why I went back so soon we due to the fact I was getting a new bid in a area where I wouldn’t have to constantly strain my back and knee, that dream of easy work ended that Tuesday when I was told to go on the machines. Relieving breaks is fine but I knew once they ask you, they would make it a habitual habit to pull me another female in our are to those machines. My back and knee were hurting again, so I got a note from my doctor limiting what I did on the machines, and that asshole of a supervisor from the machines told me to get off the clock and come back when I get paperwork. That was 10/16/18, I wasn’t even in my area for 2 weeks before being sent out of the building. The union told me to go on unemployment and another supervisor gave me light duty forms so my doctor can fill out. I work in the post office processing plant in white plains NY, according to the union and its “laws” or whatever they call it, you can’t pull people out of their bided area and move them elsewhere if there is mail in their areas. To add insult to injury, they would put overtimers in my area while I had to work on the machines for 5 + hours and take me lunch every night at the end.

What prompted me to get the restriction form, on that Friday, I was told my that supervisor to “work faster and keep up with the mail”. I told him “this is a 3 person job now, the machine is long the mail is coming out too fast and I am in pain, I can wait any faster, bring me another person to help sweep the machine or drop it, I can’t keep up”. He said I have to work fast and walked away, so I started yelling at him “this isn’t my bid”. But he never responded. A few “old heads” and even a supervisor told me “he can’t say that so go get a note from the doctor”. I did, but it back fired and I was out of the building for 3 weeks.

My supervisor, put in sick leave I was grateful because I had something coming to me to pay my bills but if anything were to happen I won’t be cover much now. I wanted to do the right thing to cover myself and not get hurt and this incompetent supervisor sends me out the building when my own supervisor did see the need for me to leave? My bid is in the manual letter aisle, light duty is in the letter aisle. I told the DB (machines) supervisor, “I can work my bid no problem, I just have issues working on the machines for too long, why should go on light duty for an area I am already in?” He said I had a restriction so I had to leave. So I left….

There is a way of treating people, I’ve worked there for 8 years and from time to time I get treated like crap, but this took the cake. I got comfortable because it was a stable income to pay off my debt and help me do more investments to gain the comfortable lifestyle I feel I deserve. Life is funny, but I do know everything happens for a reason, and I do believe/rather be sent out the building ok then to get hurt on the job and I won’t be the same again. That’s where I felt my body was going and this is why I tried to cover myself because I don’t want to permanently hurt or disable myself for a job that doesn’t give two shits about me.

I really don’t want to go back there, I am looking for something new, I don’t want to go back to school, I hate it and my brains are fried, I can’t remember a thing sadly. So what is there for me to do? I will go there and work, I feel so indifferent about the whole situation, I did fill the form out and apparently I was suppose to be back 2 weeks ago but the person put my form in the wrong mail box 😐

The union will grieve the 3 weeks I was out and I will make sure that they do! I hate it there, there is no future in the post office sadly. This is what happens when they choose yes people instead of people who care about the mail and how it’s sent out. Yes I was overlooked many times to become a supervisor or in plant, but it is whatever, I know what I must do to be comfortable and I will strive for that!

Until next time!!!💖

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